Last week I met with a submissive who identified as a top but enjoyed spanking so much he even liked to be spanked. I always smile when I encounter this in my dungeon. It's not uncommon for dominant men to contact me for a session. Often it's a situation similar to this - they have discovered a fetish so strong it pushes them into new territory and rather than ask their submissive to spank them, they let me do it. I always smile when this type of fetishist asks the inevitable question, "Do you like to get spanked?" they ask, eyes wide with hope. "Never say never," is my standard reply to an impossible question. And never have I ever been spanked by a client. This days' spanko/spankee loved the classic over the knee (OTK) style. Unfortunately for him I was in a more sadistic mood that afternoon. I do love the feeling of crushing a man's member between my thighs while I wail on his bottom, but for this scene I tossed him on the spanking bench instead and gave him something to cry about. Do you have a fetish for spanking? What's your style? OTK with roleplay? and squirming? Or does your fetish bring our the masochist in you? Personally I enjoy both, it just depends on the day and my mood. I told the submissive if he came back to see me again then next time I will put him over my knee. Next time. Never say never.

I recently met a submissive who is what many women of my condition would consider the ideal. He is a service submissive. An actual service submissive. That means his pleasure is derived from my happiness. It means he strives to understand what I want and make it happen. My happiness is his happiness. But that's only the obvious part. Because many suitors may describe themselves as a service submissive but it quickly becomes clear whether it is a lifestyle, or a fetish. When someone is a service submissive they have a healthy ego. They are capable of occupying a submissive role full time while maximizing their functionality and the value they add to the relationship. A service submissive is never a burden, always an asset and should be tended to like the prized possession that they are by the one fortunate enough to be blessed with a selfless, capable submissive. They are the knights and the beta boys of the BDSM community and they are to me the absolute best. A rare. The difference between a service submissive and someone with a service fetish is the service submissive lives to serve and is consumed by their need to please on a near constant basis. Someone with a service fetish often has a directly sexual connect to their service and therefore often only wants to serve when they are sexually frustrated or turned on. How do I know this? Because my service submissive Sasha Shame has done whatever I asked of them for over 15 years and we have had only one scene together - ever. I like to test the limits of those who serve me, especially their devotion and loyalty. What does service mean to you?

Hello all, My name is Domina Vontana and I am a full time professional and lifestyle Dominatrix in Washington DC since 2006. Maybe you saw my Valentine's Day gift guide in last month's issue? I am a trained healthcare professional and have taught sexual health since 2010. I have been a guest lecturer at Johns Hopkins since 2012. I think this forum is a great place to find like minded folks and good information. So let's begin. What do you want to know about BDSM? What have you always wanted to ask a Dominatrix? I will be answering up to half a dozen questions that are well written, polite, and sincere. Let's discuss...