Hello everyone, my name is Latex Lover. I am a latex fetishist who has spent the last year being targeted by Dominatrix catfishes and I wanted to share my experiences and point out typical behaviours used by these people.
What is a catfish?
A catfish is someone using the identity of someone else with desirable traits in order to get something they want. In a kink context, they’ve stolen content that is not their’s, looking to rip off unsuspecting fetishists. In the BDSM sphere it is usually the work of a latex model or dominatrix to secure a session deposit that the catfish HAS NO ABILITY TO OR NO INTENT OF PROVIDING. This gives legitimate performers and models a bad name and often has led to them receiving complaints even when they have no knowledge of their image and content being stolen.
For me, it all started last year when the first lockdown was imposed here in the UK; I had a lot more free time on my hands so I started following a lot more latex models and influencers on Instagram. Not too long after, I noticed I’d get followers like “Mistress_XYZ123” or “Goddess XYZ”. To put some context as to what I post on my account, I had a couple of photos of my video games, trading cards and some of my friends; it’s a personal account with friends following me from all stages of my life and there’s no indication I was into kink, so there was no reason to think I was into anything. After a month I ‘privated’ my account to make sure all followers would become requests. Unfortunately, this didn’t stop them; they kept coming and coming. So rather than just batting them off, I realised this was a big problem. Influencers and models I enjoyed the work of were complaining about catfish accounts on their stories; it was time to do something. So I started ‘scambaiting’.
What is scambaiting?
Scambaiting is the internet vigilantism used to waste scammers’ time. Depending on how a person goes about it, you can learn about a scam, scammer or intricate things such as the dialect of the scammer. If you do plan on scambaiting, it is ALWAYS suggested that you never divulge any real personal information and are always cautious when doing so, because although you may be wise to their catfish scam, you never know if they’re working something else on you.
Here are some tips to stay aware of when being approached by a catfish:
Here’s the golden rule: Dommes will rarely approach a submissive first. Do you randomly get a follow or a message from a domme you’ve never engaged with before? Be on your guard and do some investigating.
The Followers / Following ratio: Are they following more people than they have followers? While this is more an indicator of newer accounts, this actually shows they’ve been mass following people and something to indicate this person may not be who they say they are. Most dommes like to have more followers than they are following as I believe it’s an algorithm thing.
Handle: Do their handles match? Instagram and Twitter have an @ and name system. Does their name match? Usually they do, however there has been a laughable amount of times where one doesn’t match the other.
URL: Similar to how Instagram and Twitter have an @ and a name system, Facebook has URL and name system. It is in my experience that scammers have often repurposed their personal accounts as a catfish account. When they change their name, the URL doesn’t automatically change with it. So Domme Cathy still is Facebook.com/XYZ123 and that should be a way to distinguish who you are looking at.
Older posts and tags: Similar to the URL tip, the repurposing of personal Facebook accounts mean that these people still might have old posts on them. If not then there’s a good chance they’re tagged in a post and likewise the names don’t change.
In this photo is an example I questioned the authenticity of a catfish who had left pictures on the account which showed a black woman, but the content they’d stolen was of a white woman. It was quite a bizarre exchange.
Consistency: Are the women in the photos the same from photo to photo? Sex workers aren’t self-obsessed robots, they’ll post pictures of others from time to time for birthdays, milestones and other important events. With that they will credit them, @mention them etc; not doing so looks bad. So when a scammer posts a picture of another sex worker without credit, it looks inconsistent. You don’t know whether they’ve just taken a load of random pictures or they’ve taken a load of pictures without context. It always looks a bit weird and suspicious to me. Question it either to yourself or to them. Investigate: do they know who they are? Why aren’t they crediting them? (Obviously check their answers).
Research: Do a little bit of research! Since this became a problem, a lot more people have started using watermarks on their content and a lot of scammers won’t actually care and continue to reupload them. GOOD. This gives YOU the edge. The watermark is basically a business card; try and make it out and use it. Search out the person whose identity has been assumed and make them aware that their identity has been assumed for catfishing.
Upload time frame: When were the first photos uploaded and how far apart? There’s a good chance you’re actually in the first few waves of mass followers after an account has been created. Chances are the account was created a couple of hours ago with around 1-5 photos uploaded in a very short time span. Suspicious? OF COURSE.
Location: Where are you from? New York? Me too! Catfishes LOVE being ‘coincidentally’ where you’re from; it’s all part of being sure you’re compatible for a session. I mean, you can’t exactly session if you’re 10,000 miles apart in person right? Be sure to check for catfishes who completely assume their victims’ identity and actually copy locales in their bio. It does seem weird but a couple of times I’ve had it where they try and convince me that they are in New Zealand when in reality they are in Britain (or quite often in Nigeria).
While I couldn’t get a complete screenshot of the process, one of the first things they ask after “How are you” is “Where are you?”, and this is why.
Generic Bio: Do they present themselves like a classified ad in their bio? “Loyal caring domme seeking submissive” or “I seek a slave I can make use of for my own sexual needs, DM for tribute”; basically a load of generic BS. Generic adjectives saying a Domme is seeking a submissive, with no links or anything? Yeah, well that's a bad sign. Social media is a great way to advertise, but a catfish doesn’t have anything legitimate to advertise. Sometimes you do see genuine links to the Domme’s fans and clip pages and you do have to keep an eye out for that; if it fits how it’s done normally with links pages that act as digital business cards.
Verification: Do they have some sort of way to verify that they are who they say they are? While I’ve been called out for suggesting this, it’s still valid. I will preface this by saying if you’re not taking the other tips into account and asking Dommes with 10k followers, less than 1k follows, has an active stream of clip sale promo posts(for Twitter), has a bio that promotes their site(s) (Also a Twitter feature due to Facebook's anti-SWer stance), and posts fairly often in a manner that doesn’t seem suspicious. Then you need to consider if you really need to consider wasting everyone's time by asking for verification. The few times I’ve actually asked for verification it’s a 3 second gif clip that didn’t really qualify as a verification, it didn’t have my name or their handle which is kind of the point. For most newbies this would likely catch them out if they showed a small amount of cynicism if they didn’t understand verification but remember - their name or your name. Like a picture with todays newspaper you need to know that they are who they say they are by proving they can take a picture with something modifiable. Obviously use your best judgement here but it’s likely a scam.
Grammar: How is their grammar? Their English skills? While I understand not everyone has the perfect english skills, be sure to dissect what they are saying. Does it make sense? Probably not but to them it sounds right. They speak like that every day. While dommes aren’t invulnerable to typos, they will likely usually use the best grammar they can when draining their submissives.
Quality of images: How good does that image look? A lot of Sex workers and models see social media as a way to advertise and why not? They know better than to post poor quality photos of themselves as it reflects poorly on their brand. However since there is no save function on Instagram the scammers have to resort to screen capturing, on low quality devices on mobile data. If the person who has approached you has consistently low quality photos it is likely a scam.
BDSM Authority? - One of the outrageous scams going around was that your tribute would be going to secure a number or identifying code with some sort of office or authority on BDSM. There is no examination body for this kink, people learn through experience and the experiences of others. If we see some sketchy stuff the community will call it out. In the last nearly 2 years I have seen multiple times people quote tweeting dangerous whipping practices with criticisms that were completely valid. If someone is telling you that your $300 tribute or so is going to some BDSM authority be sure to report and block.
In closing I want to say this is a very scary scam, it takes very few resources to pull off compared to most other scams which include only a phone with a data plan. These cons are run by people who barely understand the industry targeting those who either barely understand it themselves or are blinded by the pictures of the lovely women they see. Frankly I’d love to see every one of these con artists taken to court by every person who has had their content misappropriated and person who has been scammed out of their money but unfortunately this scam just doesn’t hold much justice for anyone.
To be blunt, these men take advantage of the possibility/likelihood you are getting horny to the fetish content you engage with to cloud your judgement into getting you to send them money. You won’t think twice and you will send, there’s even the possibility where these situations lead to further blackmail. PLEASE, FOR YOUR OWN SAFETY AND WELLBEING THINK AND EDUCATE YOURSELF BEFORE YOU SEND. Find yourself a professional who will actually give you value for your money and be sure to research someone who is a right fit for you! <3
I hope this has been educational.
Latex Lover (You can find me at https://twitter.com/LoverofLaatex)