• Darkside Magazine

What You See IS What You Get


It really IS that straightforward, but that doesn’t mean I’m an easy person to love. I have been battling CPTSD and BPD since childhood, only receiving treatment since early this year. I’m a complex and hypersensitive (physically as well as emotionally), a broken soul who is trying her hardest to find inner peace. I’m no victim, I am a survivor and damn proud of it! I don’t hide what I think or how I’m feeling, I am vulnerable, I wear my heart on my sleeve and am naturally nurturing and kind but I will be a complete bitch who will bite very hard if you gaslight, push my boundaries or hurt my family; just because I have a heart, doesn’t mean I’m naive, a pushover or a doormat.


My outspoken ways have caused many to view me as trouble, those who know me well will argue this as completely inaccurate. My issue isn’t that I want to cause trouble, but rather, I lack the patience to deal with the projected insecurities and faults of others; people enjoy painting blame but never want to admit their own wrongs. If you throw me your bullshit, I WILL call you out on it, because I believe in owning ones faults, ego is a disgusting trait and I will fight to defend myself from any and all attacks. I’m so brutally honest with myself and others that there’s no need to guilt or shame me, I do a much better job of it myself. Overall, I take pride in being transparent and outspoken, even if it fucks me up sometimes...


This is why those who have been my submissives since discovering this lifestyle about 6 years ago will testify that I have always been a good and true Domme to them, unless they misused, cheated or betrayed me. I own my wrongs and don’t see myself as this perfected “Goddess” that everyone unrealistically expects me to be, in fact, such titles annoy me if used outside a genuine D/s relationship.

I’m only human, I’m both light and dark, good and bad, but I am true to myself. I take fault and apologise even (and especially) to subs who put their lives in my hands. Fantasy is fun but what matters is how much is put into guiding and loving true subs who would literally die for you. This isn’t a game to me, it isn’t even mainly about sex or play, but mostly to do with the mind and heart. Appreciation and kindness, love and devotion, time and patience,... this is not what a sub must do for their Domme but rather what their Domme must provide their subs with, forever, until their last breath.


I should mention that I have an extremely fulfilling lifestyle with the most incredible partners, all of us are on the gender-fluid spectrum and we understand each other well. We live together as a “V” dynamic poly-family and it works beautifully, they are protective over each other as they are with me. I’m not here to collect partners, in fact I don’t ever really see myself having more than 2-3, ideally with my current setting staying this way for life while casually dating a 3rd on the side. We are planning a family and we can’t imagine life would ever become more perfect than it already is... so if we meet people outside our current dynamic that’s fine but we certainly aren’t desperate to add more people to our tribe.

My partners live the way wish to live, as free individuals with the added understanding that neither of us will cause intentional pain to one another and -unlike people I’ve known in recent years- truly value the meaning of boundaries; you never ever intentionally break someone you love, and the moment you realise you’re hurting someone, you stop. My partners and I respect that everyone has their limits, we need our own space and we don’t demand or feel entitled to truly “own” one another. Collaring is symbolically important, but it doesn’t mean you have the right to abuse or neglect. We strive to be a good example of what poly could be like if everyone just learned to be more selfless, empathetic and communicate honestly on a daily basis.

Unfortunately, even in this so called “age of acceptance”, I’ve been called all sorts for living with 2 partners -mostly by sad lonely people who can’t even find a partner due to their inability to work on their inner selves... I feel disgust yet pity for these hateful individuals. As much as I love being the Queen Bee in a female led relationship, I do not favour hierarchy, contradictory maybe, but you’d have to witness our dynamic to understand how equal we are. It takes time to build something solid, you can’t just date us for a week and demand to be equally important. At the end of the day, my partners are my main priority because they’ve earned my trust and love, as I have with them, I adore them more than anything and will cut out anyone who jeopardises our stable home. If you don’t like or understand my lifestyle, please move along. Trying to cunningly steal, break up, manipulate or otherwise poison my partners against me will ultimately just have the opposite effect, you’re just wasting your time because we truly practice loyalty.


So there we have it, a rundown of me as a person, my life, beliefs, values etc. So it might be best to just walk away before I suck you into my “Tarasphere” and then eat you alive like a “human version of a praying mantis”... gotta love the things people refer me to, still makes me laugh


By Lady Tara

FetLife: ElemenTara

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